Ever wonder what happens when an actor really doesn’t want to kiss their co-star? While movie romances might look magical on screen, the reality behind those perfect lip-locks can be surprisingly awkward and sometimes even against an actor’s wishes. From breath mints to body doubles, Hollywood has plenty of tricks up its sleeve when it comes to on-screen smooches. But sometimes actors find themselves in uncomfortable situations where they have little control over who they kiss or how those kisses happen.
When actors refused because of personal relationships
Being in a relationship while working as an actor can create some tricky situations. Just ask Brad Pitt, who reportedly felt uncomfortable kissing Cate Blanchett in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” because of his relationship with Angelina Jolie at the time. According to Blanchett, Pitt was so hesitant about their kissing scenes that they ended up not kissing at all in the final cut of the movie. This kind of situation happens more often than you might think, with actors trying to balance their real-life relationships with job requirements.
More recently, Penn Badgley from the Netflix show “You” asked producers to cut down on intimate scenes because he wanted to respect his marriage. He felt that showing too much physical affection on screen might affect his real-life relationship. In his case, the show’s creators were willing to work with him, but not all actors are so lucky. Many stars find themselves having to choose between keeping their job or standing firm on their boundaries, especially when contracts are already signed and filming schedules are tight.
Religious beliefs that kept lips apart
Some actors draw a hard line on kissing scenes because of their religious beliefs. Neal McDonough, a devout Catholic actor who has appeared in shows like “Desperate Housewives,” has a strict no-kissing policy that applies to everyone except his wife. His commitment to this principle reportedly cost him a role on the TV show “Scoundrels,” but he stands by his decision. McDonough eventually found ways to work around the issue, with some directors writing scripts that avoid kissing scenes altogether for his characters.
Kirk Cameron, who became famous on the sitcom “Growing Pains” and later focused on Christian films, also refuses to kiss actresses on screen. For his Christian movie “Fireproof,” the filmmakers came up with a creative solution when a kissing scene was necessary – they dressed Cameron’s real-life wife in a wig and filmed her from behind to stand in for the actress. This trick allowed Cameron to stay true to his values while still completing the scene needed for the story. These examples show how some productions will make accommodations for strongly held beliefs, while others simply replace actors who won’t comply.
Co-star issues that made kisses impossible
Sometimes the problem isn’t about personal values but rather issues with the co-star. Thandiwe Newton once refused to kiss Gerard Butler in the movie “RocknRolla.” While the exact reason wasn’t made public, it suggests that personality clashes or other interpersonal issues can affect on-screen chemistry. These situations put actors in difficult positions where they have to weigh their comfort against professional expectations. Megan Fox also reportedly refused a kissing scene with a co-star, showing that even major stars sometimes draw boundaries.
Lindsay Lohan made headlines when she refused to kiss Charlie Sheen in “Scary Movie 5.” Reports suggested she was concerned about Sheen’s personal reputation and health history. The production team had to use creative camera angles and body doubles to work around her refusal. Sandra Bullock once complained about Ben Affleck’s bad breath during their kissing scenes, highlighting another common issue actors face. While some stars can demand changes, less established actors often have no choice but to go through with uncomfortable kisses or risk being labeled “difficult” in an industry where reputation matters.
Awkward age gaps that made everyone uncomfortable
Young actors often face particularly uncomfortable situations when it comes to on-screen kisses. Millie Bobby Brown described her kiss with co-star Finn Wolfhard on “Stranger Things” as “the most awkward thing in the world.” As teen actors, they were both inexperienced and felt nervous about performing such intimate scenes in front of a crew. The pressure is even worse when there’s a significant age gap between actors, which can create power imbalances and genuine discomfort, especially for the younger performer who may feel they can’t speak up.
Kristen Stewart has spoken about how difficult it was to kiss Taylor Lautner in the “Twilight” series, partly due to the artificial nature of their relationship in the story. For young actors still figuring out their own identities and boundaries, these forced romantic scenes can be particularly challenging. While modern productions are increasingly using intimacy coordinators to help make these situations more comfortable and professional, many actors in earlier years or on smaller productions had no such support. Instead, they had to navigate uncomfortable kisses with little preparation and often no say in how scenes would unfold.
The historical rules that regulated movie kisses
Movie kisses weren’t always as common or explicit as they are today. From 1930 to 1968, American movies followed the Motion Picture Production Code (sometimes called the Hays Code), which strictly regulated what could be shown on screen. Under these rules, kisses couldn’t last too long and had to be relatively chaste. Actors had to follow these guidelines regardless of their personal comfort level. Even married couples in movies were shown in separate beds, and any display of passion was heavily restricted.
During this era, actors had even less say about their boundaries since the industry rules already dictated what was allowed. The strict code meant that intimate scenes were carefully choreographed within narrow parameters, giving actors little room for input. When the code finally ended in the late 1960s, it led to more realistic portrayals of relationships but also created new challenges for actors who suddenly faced more explicit expectations. The transition period was particularly difficult as industry standards shifted rapidly, leaving many actors unsure about what they could refuse.
Same-sex kisses that caused controversy
Same-sex kisses on screen have often been subject to extra scrutiny and pressure. Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried reportedly had reservations about their kissing scene in “Jennifer’s Body,” with the studio pushing for more explicit content than the actresses were comfortable with. The scene became more about pleasing a certain audience demographic than telling the story naturally. This kind of situation highlights how marketing considerations can override actor comfort, especially when it comes to scenes that might generate publicity or controversy.
Will Smith has expressed regret about not going through with a kissing scene with Anthony Michael Hall in “Six Degrees of Separation,” admitting his immaturity and fear about how it might affect his image at the time. His decision shows how societal pressure and concerns about career impact can influence actors’ choices. As public attitudes toward LGBTQ+ representation have evolved, these kinds of scenes have become more common, but actors still sometimes face pushback or pressure from studios, fans, or even their own management when such scenes are required.
Race issues that affected on-screen intimacy
Interracial kisses have a complicated history in Hollywood. Denzel Washington reportedly requested that kissing scenes with Julia Roberts be removed from “The Pelican Brief” after facing backlash for an interracial kiss in a previous film. His experience highlights how social prejudices can affect what happens on screen and the difficult position actors of color often find themselves in. While wanting to maintain their artistic integrity, they also have to consider potential negative reactions from audience segments or worry about being typecast.
The first interracial kiss on American television between William Shatner and Nichelle Nichols on “Star Trek” in 1968 was so controversial that producers tried to film alternate versions. The network was worried about Southern affiliates refusing to air the episode. Nichols later revealed that she and Shatner deliberately messed up all the alternative takes to ensure the kiss made it to air. This kind of behind-the-scenes resistance to interracial intimacy created added pressure for actors of color, who often had little power to push back against decisions made by predominantly white executives and producers.
Next time you see a passionate kiss in a movie or TV show, remember there might be a complicated story behind it. From religious convictions to personal conflicts, many factors can make these scenes challenging for the actors involved. While stars today have more power to set boundaries than ever before, many still find themselves kissing co-stars they’d rather not—proving that even in Hollywood, not everything is as magical as it appears on screen.
